it feels really uncomfortable. typing like that i mean. with the table so far away from my bed. my laptop's gonna live up to its name and lie on my lap when i type today while i lean back on my bolster against the wall. psychology today was a torture to attend. i liked the other lecturer better, he was much more interesting. this guy... really boring. comparable to mr leong our accounting lecturer. 2 boring lectures in a row. i couldn't take it during psychology lecture and slept for awhile. the first time i slept in a lecture this semester. couldn't help it. was really tired.

seal it in a black box and keep it deep inside you, when you crash and explode, thats when it'll really matter

does anybody pay attention to the song i upload on my blog? because, i really want y'all to listen to them, hahaha...


To Love Somebody

Theres a light
A certain kind of light
That never shone on me
I want my life to be lived with you
Lived with you
Theres a way everybody say
To do each and every little thing
But what does it bring
If I aint got you, aint got ?
You dont know what its like, baby
You dont know what its like

To love somebody
To love somebody
To love somebody
The way I love you

In my brain
I see your face again
I know my frame of mind
You aint got to be so blind
And Im blind, so very blind
Im a man, cant you see
What I am
I live and breathe for you
But what good does it do
If I aint got you, aint got ?

travel geog sucks

your friend, my honour

such a complicated thing
i mean Love
humans yearn for it so much
yet
receiving from the wrong person
would actually be undesirable

such a complicated thing
i mean Love
humans yearn for it so much
yet
receiving from the right person
could actually hurt

such a complicated thing
i mean Love
an unending bond they would say
yet
could actually destroy
the very bonds it served to connect

such a complicated thing
i mean Love
with it, does friendship not exist?

Why, Love
you look nothing more than a word
In your plans, do you hold nothing more
than just destruction for me?
if that is the case,
i would never have sought you out.

once again, what are you so afraid of.

trust me when i say i only want to be your friend

tell me its not another mistake

Goodbye - Air Supply

Here are the lyrics to song, take some time, wait for the song to load and listen to it before you leave. it's worth it.



I can see the pain living in your eyes
And I know how hard you try
You deserve to have much more
I can feel your heart and I simpathize
And I'll never criticize
All you've ever meant to my life


I don't want to let you down
I don't want to lead you on
i don't want to hold you back
From where you might belong


You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to say but goodbye


You deserve the chance at the kind of love
I'm not sure i'm worthy of
Losing you is painful to me


I don't want to let you down
I don't want to lead you on
i don't want to hold you back
From where you might belong


You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to say but goodbye


You would never ask me why
My heart is so disguised
I just can't live a lie anymore
I would rather hurt myself
Than to ever make you cry
There's nothing left to try
Though it's gonna hurt us both
There's no other way than to say goodbye

from bert's blog which inturn came from quanhao's blog, i think

...

because wanting more only causes pain
build your life upon contentment
that is the only thing you can do

desire more, take a gamble and lose everything you have
your life is fine as it is
there is nothing you need

but you were happy
until love took over you
'would it have been better if it never happened?'

pack your things and leave your emotions behind
that is the only thing you can do right now
maybe you'll be happier

heartaches are signs of weaknesses
'quick! cover them up!'
it will heal, they will go away

just wait.

guitar story part 2... before i forget

before i forget to continue my guitar story, i'd better do it now. hahaha! procrastination kills. so i stopped at me abandoning my electric guitar. i didn't really touch my guitar, through those periods of time until i went into poly, i had no idea what i had done. study? nah. game? probably. sleep? alot alot. hahaha! my guitar laid there for so long, i had no idea what to do with it. this went on into poly. this was probably the only thing i didn't regret coming to poly for. the only strong enough reason; sparking off my passion in playing the guitar. not saying i regretted coming poly, i think its great, the course is really fun and interesting. but i really want to go university, i think i just screwed up my chances. would i have had the chance to go university if had gone to JC??? probably, but at least it's not determined until the As are over. hahaha! but poly is alright i guess, there're always chances for further education so i think it was a safe choice. oh shit, i just digressed.

anyways. how did the hell did poly bring out my interest in playing the guitar deep down hidden inside me???? hahaha! it was all thanks to the people. thanks to comm skills for telling us to talk about things that are memorable to us. thanks to andy who brought his guitar. that song he played, i will always remember how to play it; more than words. that time i didn't know how to play of course. but after listening to him play, i decided i must really go try. and so i did. i went to cheong the song. well.. the first complete song i learnt how to play. i was really really happy. the feeling was incredible.

continuing my guitar journey, i started to strum no matter how awkward it seemed. i listened to songs and listened closely to the strokes. i learnt 'you're beautiful' by james blunt. but i still can't play it without the chords because i don't memorise, i hate memorising. and finally, the strokes became more swift and more 'natural', i could finally strum. but there was that hurdle about strumming and singing at the same time, i still have that problem. but i can roughly sing and play at the same time. it would of course wouldn't be better than just focusing on one task and doing it. chord changing was still a problem for me then. but as they say, practice makes perfect, i got addicted to the guitar. hahaha! it's simply too fun! hahaha!

i got myself a guitar last year during christmas with money from vacation work 299 dollars, a Maestro SD 3, it had a problem with the fret leveling but i got it fixed. i dammit love my guitar. i wouldn't call myself a beginner guitarist, but neither would i call myself advanced. i want to get better.bettter better better. it's a great friend in times of sadness.

i want to get better. one day, i want to teach guitar and spread the passion of the instrument i have grown to love.

with the right mood, this song'll make you cry

"Pretty Maids All In A Row"

Hi there,
How are 'ya?
it's been a long time
Seems like we've come a long way
My, but we learn so slow
and heroes, they come
and they go
and leave us behind as if
we're s'pposed to know why
Why do we give up our hearts to the past?
and why must we grow up so fast?

And all you wishing well fools
with your fortunes
someone should send you a rose with
love from a friend,
it's nice to here from you
again
And the storybook comes to a close
Gone are the ribbons and bows
Things to remember places to go
Pretty Maids all in a Row
Oh, oh oh, oh......

sian

i don't think i'll be continuing the story, it's just too boring. i'm bored, not as in bored like i have nothing to do. but just feeling restless. yes! thats the word. restless.

hey Hope, you came
'are u staying' i asked
yes was your answer
'why'd you go the last time?'
you didn't tell me
'it doesn't matter as long as you're here'
you smiled.

hey Hope, u left
'why'd you go' i asked
'me' was my answer
'why'd you drive her away?'
'me' was my answer again
'i heard she left something behind'
'nothing. just a broken red box of flesh and blood.'

the promise - tracy chapman

If you wait for me then I'll come for you
Although I've traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart
If you think of me If you miss me once in awhile
Then I'll return to you
I'll return and fill that space in your heart
Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
If you dream of me like I dream of you
In a place that's warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting
I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face, your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
Please say you'll be waiting

Together again
It would feel so good to be
In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise If it's one that you can keep, I vow to come for you
If you wait for me and say you'll hold
A place for me in your heart.

i going to talk about my life with the guitar!

i got my first guitar in sec 1! it was a yamaha classical. i bought from my friend for 20 dollars!! i have no idea where it is now. but i still remember the warcraft undead race sticker on it! i really miss it. i still the remember the times when i was still a beginner. i was really afraid of strumming the guitar because i thought the strings would break. i started to learn guitar because of NYAA bronze. i was excited about learning the guitar, but i failed at it because i failed to realise that it required practice and i lacked patience. we learnt at yamaha music school. my friends and i from NCC attended lessons for awhile until the NYAA criteria was met then we all quit together, except for afew who continued for awhile but quit in the end still. and so.. the guitar was left there. they were classical guitar lessons. too many unheard pieces, i guess it was the why reason we lost interest in it so quickly. i didn't have a real interest in music at that time too. after quitting, it was as good as saying i didn't attended guitar lessons because although they taught us how to read notes, it was completely forgotten. they didn't teach how to read tabs (notation for guitar only), they didn't teach strumming. anyways, about my classical guitar i haven't seen it in years.

as naive i was at the time, i thought that my guitar wasn't good. so... i got my mother to buy a Squire electric guitar pack for me (meaning it included an electric guitar, an amplifier, some picks, a strap and gig bag; the gig bag sucked anyway, its the worst i've/u've ever seen, trust me). i got it at sweelee at bras besah in 2004 (sec 2). so it layed in my home. of course there is the temporary craze over it. but it wore off in weeks. it was left lying there. subsequently, my friends whom knew i had an electric, borrowed it. after since, it was found mostly in my friends' house. friends because there were afew people who borrowed it. i lent it out because i wasn't using it anyways but really, i didn't want to lend to anyone at all because those friends were not really spontaneous in returning stuff. anyways, it came back recently with a broken amplifier. there was a sweelee sale the other day, i went and bought a Laney amp. it was kinda big and heavy so i dialled a cab and went home with. the sweelee warehouse is in a very ulu place. got it for 150 dollars at 50% off. original price was 300 dollars. so i guess it was kinda a good deal. i didn't manage to get my money back for the broken amp. some friends eh? i hate to ask people for money, i think money spoils relationships as the chinese saying goes 'jiang qian shang gan qing'. so oh well... nevermind. forget it.

i got my next guitar i think in secondary 3. it's a TGM acoustic, i'm unsure of what it means but my friend says it means 'the guitar man'. i got it for... err.. 65 dollars i think. it's lying in the guitar bag now with one string broken. i tuned the string the wrong way and well it broke. hahaha!.... anyway, u must have thought, at time i had already neglected my electric guitar, why did i still buy another guitar? it was through pressure from another friend, (i think i get pressured very easily, ha!) but it was good pressure i guess. he came to my house, he started by teaching me afew chords and a strumming pattern. well i practised for awhile, the same thing happened as with the electric guitar, the craze then the cold treatment. at that period of time, i just wanted to know how to play the guitar. but it is a vague statement. how do u define if a person is worthy of being said 'he knows how to play the guitar.' ? back to where i was. the cold treatment. so i stopped playing the guitar with me having no idea how to strum properly. but at that moment i already knew how to read tabs. but of course they are really easy to read, anyone could start reading them in minutes. they're basically the guitar on paper. guitar= 6 strings, tabs = 6 lines. i still remember the first chord progression my friend taught me, G - Em - C and D. that was all i knew.

with so many times of picking up the guitar and giving up. y'all must be wondering how i started
to play the guitar again right?! err.... even ur not, i'll post next time,HAHAHA, thats all for today!

wow, that was really long.

feels kinda weird

i used to love this girl. i have this friend, this classmate. they go to the same school. i think they're together. it just feels really weird.

random post

i was prepared to go to school until before i opened the door to leave the hour, i realised i haven't printed my accounting lecture notes, so i'm printing them now. seriously, the accounting notes damn alot sia, i think just i pressed somethin and the printing stopped haflway, damn. anyways, if anyone printed single side all the way for accounting, i bet his notes are damn thick, hahaha! i'm coming here just to kill time while printing the shit. damn i'm not looking forward to accounting lecture, gonna be freaking boring again. well, print finish already, time go to school

you could take a little trip around singapore river~

went for the group field trip yesterday. woke up at 9.17am when i was suppose to reach raffles place at 10am. but i hurried up and boarded the mrt at 9.50am. not bad eh. bathed, ate my breakfast and reached there really fast. i reached raffles place at about 10.15am. i wasn't the latest though, quanhao came awhile later, khermeng came shortly after quanhao. kher meng came from camp, he looked like he was going to the market, hahaha! shaun kept calling him ah peh. as in 'father' hahaha! anyway, we left the mrt together at 10.30am, walked around, we took picture with some big bird statue. the weather was really hot. as usual i sweat like crazy. after awhile we couldn't take it went to mac to properly discuss where to take pictures at before stepping under the scorching sun. we took pictures at Victoria Concert Hall, asian civilisation museum, at the singapore river and with some cosplay people, the pictures are with nat if u want to see them. they were dressing like characters in D Gray Man. i don't have the group pictures, but i do have some random ones. hahaha! not exactly interesting pictures, but i'll post them anyways.




the photographer getting the models ready



the final product: they are acting, no scandal of any sort surrounding these 2, hahaha!

Lets101 - Online Dating

saw lots of people putting this on their blog. true or not? maybe? u decide

SSM today.

SSM started out okay, opening was fine and all. we were heavily low on manpower. 6 people were taken out of sugar loaf crew to serve president nathan who came for some '>60 official opening', above that, there were absentees. but i must say yvonne the headwaiter did a great job today. and of course our beloved phoebe, the assistant headwaiter! they did a great job organising Sugar Loaf. hahaha! great job to everyone! except me. i started off operations by dropping the first plate on the tray i cleared. that potato gratin, i will never forget that moment. how it bounced off the table while i watched helplessly as it headed for the cold hard floor. without thinking, i grabbed the 2 pieces of ceramics and holding it so that the contents wouldn't fall off. but the contents spilled on my hand, it was freaking HOT. but of course at that moment i was embarrassed enough, i didn't want to embarrass myself further by putting the pieces on the table and saying it's hot. i turned around to see mr malik staring at me. i froze for a moment and asked him what to do. as usual, 'headwaiter!' but before that i cheonged to the stewarding room to drop off the broken potato gratin bowl or whatever it is called. i was really embarrassed, furthermore those students were from HTM too. i really 'lao kui-ed' myself. yvonne helped me wrap up the broken pieces while i cleaned up the mess quickly. THANK YOU YVONNE! u know when u commit a mistake then u'll feel like too malu-ed to go into the operation area again. i was really scared. but i knew i had to face it. then i walked like nothing happened, but deep inside i was feeling horrible. i destroyed her potato gratin!!!!!!!!! nooooooooooooo......... damn, stupid me. it was afterwards replaced with a tortilla. cuz after i destroyed her potato gratin there were no more left in the display. but when the tortilla was served gang gang hao the potato gratins came. yvonne served it too. THANK YOU YVONNE!

After the horrible incident, everything went quite well. then somethin interesting happened. because after awhile all the people who were suppose to serve mr nathan had left. then only left me and celine the captains without waiters. hahaha! i went to clear a guy's table, then i heard him say 'shit, then later she cannot clear', but of course, i know who he was referring to because there was only one person clearing stuff other than me. of course that 'she' was celine. i told celine about it. she said that guy had asked for her number. hahaha! understandable, i think celine is really pretty. but i didn't like the 'shit then later she cannot clear'. are u saying it so loudly so that i would actually put the tray down so that celine can clear it for u? fat hope...

I went to do PD for the last half hour of SSM. went to do with miao hong. walked through engineering school, no business. walk to business school then business start coming in, hahaha! ryun kiat got forced by his classmates to buy my orange pound cake, hahaha! i should sms him to apologise later. the damn cake was 5 dollars, i wouldn't buy it, i hate orange. hahaha! we earned only 15 dollars for walking from TCA to business and back.

at the end of the day, we didn't earn enough to hit our target which was 1400 dollars, it wasn't really our target, it was THEIR target, we didn't set it. we only earned 1320 dollars. 80 dollars short. today was a day of non stop action because of the shortage of manpower. was really really really tired.

Top Table today!

    some pictures of food! 

The setting! see the hands grabbing the menu like a rabbit? thats purdee! HAHAHA!

The Onion Gratinee.. i think

Sorry but i got his name, but he's a chicken thigh! hahaha! swimming around are potato cubes and onions and red peppers, i think

The poached pear with sorbe! nice! never knew pear could taste like that.

Not bad, albert suggested going to top table every thursday.... yeahyeah, go until the people are sick of us. go until everyone there know us right? hahaha! but actually, i don't mind. FOR FOOD!!

the time has come again for us to gather and pray that tomorrow will be a good day. tomorrow is friday. no, it is not friday the 13th. it is worse. it is friday the SSM. i'm waiter tomorrow, i don't know what i'm suppose to do except clear trays and plates and bowls. imma go ask around later! hahaha! i get nervous over the smallest stuff. i know being waiter at sugarloaf ain't as bad as being a waiter at top table but.. still i'm  rather nervous.

hope tomorrow will be a good day!

vulnerable

not that much of a poet, but here goes. dedicated to someone sad, this is yours

Nameless
what has the world done to you?
why do you look upon the world with shady eyes?
has the liar named love called on you?
has betrayal come your way so painfully
that your heart is ladened with steel,
so heavy you can hardly carry

what are you afraid so of?
why have you sealed up your heart so tightly?
is there no room for negotiations?
is there no one worthy enough
to enter your heart like a king

you've been hiding in there all alone behind those cold and lifeless walls
are you waiting for someone to knock on them
and deliver you from all this darkness
he's coming, he was always there
its time to dismantle those plates of steel;
they won't hold forever
let him hold your hand and lead you
it's a wonderful world out there









That pretty face of yours deserves more than a frown

BESE presentation

today was BESE presentation. i was suppose to wake up at 8am this morning, to do up the powerpoint, the individual fnb thing and my cue cards. i woke up at 10am instead. then i realised my trousers and shirt were not ironed. i mean they were, but they were still alittle crumpled, so i re-ironed. by the time i finished it was about 11.10am. i reached school at about 11.30am. relax people, don be envious i can reach school in just 20 mins, hahaha!!! first thing cheong to library level 6 cheong the ppt. i finished my ppt and cue cards then 1pm went to lab 6 to meet the rest to rehearse. then of course 2pm, BESE lesson, my group was the first to present. all of them were pretty serious presentations. compared to don's rapping presentations last year, hahaha! some said they nearly fell asleep until someone started to make her presentation. hahaha. i guess those who were in the class should know who it was. she was very loud, haha, thats a plus thing though. she always seems fierce, somemore she raised her voice. quite intimidating. she really reminds us of an angry primary school teacher! but don't worry! its not a bad thing! i thought her presentation was really good. just gotta work on the smilin'. haha! another loud one was Aaron i thought.

alot of people pon BESE lecture today, the lecture hall was not even 1/3 full. tomorrow i'm going with albert and purdee to top table! aaron last minute said he coming, so i'll have to ask them whether it's possible to add another person. meeting at 11.15am at the TCA lobby, can't wait! hahaha! FOOD

i saw this commercial on the TV just now! it's super cool, its called the magicwheel. for more information go to www. magicwheel.sg. see!! hahha,it's a cross over between a skate board and a bicycle. someone please go buy! i want to play!! hahaha! it's quite pricey though 350 dollars. i'm looking forward to people riding it on the road

he thought

'there is no love' he thought. his mind is blank. he doesn't know what he's doing, he doesn't know what he is feeling. his fingers move as if possessed, he continues to type on, he doesn't know what he's typing, then the msn notice popped out again. it's again one of those convos which pop out with random stuff, telling u about some website, and asking him to visit it. he's listening to 'bell bottom blues' by eric clapton. it's one of his favourite songs of all times. the solo is playing. the tone is simply heart wrenching. the chorus plays on 'do you wanna see me crawl across the floor to you? do you wanna see me beg you to take me back', then his closest friend in poly starts talking to him, he interrupted the song with a nudge, he hears. he stops typing and decides to respond to him. his friend told him not to think dirty. he had previously ask what he meant by 'need woman'. he think it sounds wrong. but he know his friend does not mean it. his friend sometimes say things before thinking, it's all part of his personality too. 'but he is a great friend' he thought. he wonders how school would've been like without him, school would have lonely. 'there's no place for me in school' he thought. it was probably just him being paranoid but, sometimes he feels really lonely. it was just one of those feelings he used to get before he entered tertiary. it's been awhile since he got this feelin'. he knows it only lasts for awhile, he'll wait for it to go away. he doesn't like it. he doesn't like to love anymore. he is afraid to love again, he is afraid of making the same mistakes he used to make. and how everything turned out. he needs close friends whom he can truly trust and feel peaceful and easy around, people whom he can dig out his heavy heart and lay it onto the table for them. 'love is such a burden' he thought. he loves music; he loves slow rock. he loves country by the eagles. these songs make him feel peaceful. and lighten the load on his heart alittle. he loves the guitar, he learned it to make music. but it seems he can't really do it. but it sure help him through the many difficult times in his life. he loves his guitar. he's thinking of what more to write as he listens to a song by the eagles called 'peaceful easy feeling'. he just wants to type, he doesn't know what else to do. he knows he has work to do but he doesn't feel like doing it yet. he just needs to keep typing and thinking to ease his confused head. he pauses. he pauses and he pauses, he doesn't know what to type anymore. but he's still typing, the song repeats, he going to change the song now. then... he decided not to change the song, cuz the song sounded so good. he sighs. he wants to have 'peaceful, easy feeling' like the song's name. he can't think of anything more to type, he's gonna stop here now though he wished he could think of more to type, but he can't.

some changes

see! my blog just more interesting with the Eagles picture! from left: Glenn Frey, Joe Walsh(My fav. Eagle), Timothy B. Schmit and Don Henley! all thanks to Bert. he shift my tagboard up, he put links up for me and of course the hotel california playing in the background! hahaa! thanks dude

back from chalet finally!

i didn't really get to fully enjoy the chalet. but i'm kinda missing it now. hahhaa! it was kinda disappointing how huili was the only one from h11 who turned up when the whole class was invited. hahahaha! but its alright, at least one came, hahaha! everyone's going to have to pay more for the chalet, sorry guys. didn't manage to keep costs down.

Monday: checked in at 3pm, before that eeling, quanhao, SC came to my house to help with the food. carry to chalet. luckily they came to help if not i'd have been dead. hahaa! my sis helped too. we had dinner at subway. the first time i didn't eat a footer, wasn't really hungry but i did have my double meat again! i ate the subway melt. after that went to get maggi mee etc. thats all for the first day, not much stuff. i slept on the floor, i think peiwen was really nice to have asked to over to the other room to sleep. but then when she woke up me up i was already on the verge of falling asleep loh. after i moved to the other room, they only slept 1 hour later, so very noisy, hahaha! but it was interesting listening to them talk.

Tuesday: i seriously cant tell ya much because i was in school for psycho project. damn. hahhaa. we did the filming of the psycho project in a day. but that one didn't work out. so today went film again. we finished in an hour. not bad sia, quite fast. then it was the BBQ at night. everyone ate alot i think. i guess thisis the HTM culture. hahaha! i slept early that night, while other people went to see bapoks at changi. ask me why? I GOT PSYCHO MEETING THE NEXT DAY. i slept quite peacefully that night. shared a bed with bert. theysaid my snoring was thunderous, and the combination of snorings constituted a symphony. hahaha!

Wednesday: today i had psycho meeting again, went to school edit video with esther, not the one from 07, this esther is from BSG. yongjian couldn't make it. we left after we figured out how to transfer the video and edited everything. BUT it was for naught becasue we refilmed the video in the library cuz the previous video was too noisy. i reached the chalet at 3.30pm, everyone had aleady gone to pulau ubin to play. i did preparations for the steamboat alone until they came at about 7pm. damn sian. no one to talk to, no one helping me. not many people stayed over today, abvout 10 i think, or less.

Thursday: esther smsed us that the video was too noisy so 12.15 we met at the library. of course before that i was still at the chalet, so must cheong home bathe then go tp. i went to get guitar strings after the meeting. after went home, SLEEP. hahaa!

thats all for these few days, too bad we didn't take any photos during the chalet. damn. i hoped everyone enjoyed the chalet! thank you everyone who helped out especially eeling, SC and quanhao! thank you all those who came!!

pictures from ncc chalet!

Don't worry, he's wearing clothes



This is Say yien and his legs blocking the camera


hahaha! Wenyong stole the camera when we were all ready


not bad except the heads kena cut off


NCC chalet was great fun, hahaha!

Cindy's birthday celebration!

we went downtown east to celebrate cindy's birthday yesterday night. that cindy ah... birthday girl then made us wait so long, hahaha, we had our dinner at arnold's BBQ chicken. we waited for cindy inside the restaurant for a long time. i had korean charbroiled. it's chicken leg meat korean style. haha, not bad i guess? after that we went to aranda country club to listen to live performance! they played hotel california! the guitarist was really good! the solo is imba!! hahaha! it was incredible how they made the song sound so good with just 2 guitars. i drunk the most beer in my life last night, i finished 4 mugs plus about one-third of another mug. it amounts to about alittle more than one jug. and i didn't get drunk! not bad not bad,it seems i can hold my liquor quite well. it was really fun with the company.

Here's a song to share; what happens when guys are bastards



It wasn't really sad the way they said good-bye
Or maybe it just hurt so bad she couldn't cry
He packed his things, walked out the door and drove away
And she became the girl from yesterday

He took a plane across the sea
To some foreign land
She stayed at home and tried so hard to understand
How someone who had been so close could be so far away
And she became the girl from yesterday

She doesn't know what's right
She doesn't know what's wrong
She only knows the pain that comes from waiting for so long
And she doesn't count the teardrops
That she's cried while he's away
Because she knows deep in her heart
That he'll be back someday

The light's on in the window; she's waiting by the phone
Talking to a memory that's never coming home
She dreams of his returning and the things that he might say
But she'll always be the girl from yesterday
Yeah, she'll always be the girl from yesterday

KILL ME I NEED FOOD!

I'M HUNGRY, ALL THAT TALK ABOUT FOOD IS MAKING ME HUNGRY!! UNAGI! SASHIMI! ALL AT SAKURA! I WANT SAKURA!! I WANT FOOD!

I'm at chalet!

i called the children's home today, but the home said it was already fully booked for the whole of june and july. i just read my mail and donovan sent a mail about the TP CSC organising spring cleaning for old folks. i think the CSC means community service club. this certainly put my mind to ease, i dunno how else we're gonna find other stuff to do.

anyway, i'm at NCC chalet now, the great pals from secondary school. great friends. although the chalet was alittle too expensive. hahaa! no choice, because there're not alot of people here. 28 dollars a person and we're not complaining. hahaha! everyone's doing their own stuff now, some cheonging psp, some playing cards, some watch anime and some sleeping. 2 of them have training tomorrow yet they still stayed over. a pity not everyone is here. i guess tomorrow there'll be more people coming. i hope. i went to aranda country to watch the live performances again with alan and wenyong, we shared a jug of tiger beer. too bad we went late, we only heard about 6 songs then they went off. anyway, george is now having chalet at K block and my sis is having her chalet afew rooms away. wtf...? what a coincidence.

my ass is hurting now. sitting on the really hard ground. i don't why it just hurts sitting on the ground here, it seems especially hard. wth. hahaha! i've finished my part of the BESE project already. Dining and Gift giving, i think my parts amounted to about 1500 words already, hahaha! half of the minimum requirement already sia. think i'll need to cut later once i get the rest of the parts from my members. oh yeah something to add to my to do list Basics of entrepreneurship!!!! haven't come up with anything, gonna have to soon, must send grace chia by this week for her to look through.

lots of stuff to do

i shall make a list of the things i have to do before i forget, then i can come and refer if i really do forget

1. call children's home, anyway, think bringing the children out not feasible anymore, hahaha, it's actually quite expensive to charter a bus. so think we'll be going over to visit the children and play games with them instead.

2. do my BESE report, i've just finished my 'dining' part, hmmm.. or am i finished? hahaha! even if it's not it should be at least 90% lah, i still have my 'gift-giving' part to do, after that i'm done, then they will all send me their parts, stuff everything in, organise, edit, go through it again, wah la! we'll be done with BESE.

3. Psychology project, now rather confusing with one of group members working during the holidays, then dunno how to organise the thing.

4. continue with chalet preparations. sorta settled my budget already actually. some stuff not added in. hope many people will come!

5. pack bag for tomorrow's NCC chalet. bring laptop to do work. sian.

6. i think we're suppose to go out for field trip on our own for the city tour right?? alright, so must remind group mates!

thats all for now, what i can remember anyway.

holidays so far

the holidays so far have been really boring, really don't know what to do with it except do projects and organise the chalet. i'm really afraid i'll lose money sia, i've been spending alot of time on my planning lately, but it's not foolproof yet. nothing's foolproof, who knows, maybe everyone suddenly cannot come, hahahaha! then i eat the bbq food myself! hahaha! worse case scenario.......

it's probably too far fetched but well.. i have to start planning how much to rebate the people who are only coming for the BBQ and not staying. from past experiences, these things have been happening since the start of time. today i've been doing work, BESE project, i've learnt not to do things at the last minute, especially since the chalet is on the last week. everyone reading this! faster go do ur projects!! later too much work then cannot come chalet how?! hahaha! i hope the 2h11 people will come too. i hope the chalet will be noisy and full of people! i hope those who can't go, will be able to come. i hope it's not about the money. if it is, they don't have to pass me the money immediately. i'm in no hurry to get the money but i really hope everyone can come for the chalet!!! talking about money, i got 2 chalets this holiday, the first one is NCC chalet which starts on this coming monday until wednesday. BROKE LOH. hahhaah!

i'm calling the children's home tomorrow to check if we could bring the children out to play on wednesday. abit too last minute but yeah... hahaha! cheong! if we are going to bring them out, there'll be alot of stuff to settle. like transportation.. food.. bla bla bla. things like that. my point of view is that it is no point if we just go down to the home and help out. it's not like they couldn't manage. and it's not as if we were going down regularly from then on. if we really wanted to make the kids happy, we should bring them out and play! i hope the home will approve of the visit tomorrow, i thinki should start drafting out a proposal like..... now. hahaha!

This is the reason why Don Henley is my favourite song writer

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
...People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us,
Doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you, Baby
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you inside

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

Holidays!

i guess you can say my holidays have started since my mid semester tests are over and since the proficiency test tomorrow isn't really considered a mid semester test. but it's giving me more stress than the accounting paper gave me. i wouldn't say i'm stressful, it's just more pressuring. get what i mean. hahaha!

anyway, today i spent the whole day thinking about the chalet. not really the whole day, i slept alot today too. i sent emails to 1H07 and 2H12 through albert. hope everyone can come if not i really will kui ben. i already planned a budget in case of people not being to make it and stuff. i tried to do worst case scenario as much as possible. as much as i want the chalet to be succesful, i can't fork out anymore extra money. at least i try to minimise. i'm paying for everything first. planning is hard work, i think i need to get a confirmed list of people going for the chalet if not shit happens then i end paying for alot of stuff like the way i organised stuff in the past. but it ain't gonna happen this time dammit.

and i just realised.... ALBERT!! WHY U SEND 2H11, THAT EMAIL IS FOR 1H07 AND 2H12 LAH! kao. later they kena frightened come for BBQ also must pay so much then they don't wanna come alrei. i'm gonna go draft out an email for the 2H11 now. hai... then start asking for confirmations.

at the wrong time.... yet again

i'm studying for travel geog... err.. well at the moment i'm blogging, but i was studying and am going to continue studying after i type somethin here. anyway, i just watched the chuan liu bu xi show on Channel 8, it was really sad. especially about the mother who protected her child with her own body and died leaving a message for her child through her mobile phone. fortunately her child survived... if not her efforts would have been futile. she was very brave, i teared alittle during that part. alittle. the whole show was very solemn compared to previous charity shows. hope the Sze Chuan people are doing fine. i feel so lucky to live in Singapore. and.... we don't really have anything to complain about compared those people affected by the earthquake. what are our troubles compared to their's? what are our miseries compared to their's? Why are we taking for granted everything that we have? I cannot imagine living at Sze Chuan right now. i don't ever want to lose my friends and family and my home.

Appreciate everything we have.

A song about appreciating what you have.
New York Minute by The Eagles

3 digit post!

this is my 101th post! the last one was the 100th! i just returned from esplanade to watch the VJC band concert (Majestia 23), although i've never been the kind to appreciate orchestras, i could tell it was really good!! i thought the concert was on the 22nd, it was only after BESE tutorial when i was eating in the concert that i realised the concert was on the 21st! i was meeting zhengyi at 5.45pm and i only realised at 4.45pm. heng ah... i managed to make it in time, i went home to put my stuff and then cheong to cityhall. luckily there was BESE today so my attire was Esplanade-worthy. but it was not BESE-worthy. i wore a dark coloured shirt and a lighter coloured tie. i always wear a white shirt to go with my blazer. however today, i couldn't find my cuff links so i had no choice but to wear another one. damn i need to get cuff links, maybe even a new shirt. cuff links are a nuisance.

alrighty so 5.45pm i reached city hall, we had dinner at the japanese pasta restaurant at city link mall. it's near asian kitchen and thai express, just after the only escalator in citylink mall if ya know where it is. i had soft shell crab tempura spaghetti and zhengyi had some tomato sauced chicken thing. mine was really dry. zhengyi's one was sticky. she spammed the cheese, unfortunately, it was not like the cheese at pastamania. the cheese was the cause of the stickiness anyway... i think. i tried alittle bit and i decided i shouldn't have the cheese at all. it tasted abit like milk powder. ya know the kind of distinct taste of powdered milk? yeah.. combined with the taste of cheese. weird. the meal was mediocre. we went to buy ice cream after that then made our way to esplanade. and of course. the first place i went to was Maestro@Esplanade to look at guitars! sadly the one i thought was nice was gone from the rack. damn. i guess i shouldn't be thinking of getting guitars when i just got 1 last christmas but i can't help it when i see nice guitars, hahaha!

I'm slacking on my sis's com while waiting for my laptop to reformat itself. sian......................

waiting waiting waiting

i'm back

haven't updated in awhile, now i'm back! won't be a very long post since it's kinda late and i'm going turn in soon. 2H12 is great so far. i notice some anti-crowd people already. notice i didn't call them anti-social, because they're not, i'm not even sure whether it's the right word to use. how would you call people who leave suddenly after a long while without saying anything from a group conversation when we were suppose to be discussing something? judging from what i know about these people, somehow i felt they meant no offence by leaving suddenly, they probably felt they had no place in the convo, so they left. hahaha! but still it's kinda 'anti', get what i mean. we had our first bday celebration last friday. it was purdee's birthday! i used to meet her all the time on the bus on the way to school, she gets on 69 a stop after me. i recognised her as a lecture mate. and damn she looked fierce! it was probably because her face looked like she was frowning all the time. hahaha! but she's okay, nice to talk to and stuff after knowing her. i was responsible for transporting the birthday cake i bought from choc-a-bloc from my house to school. it was really troublesome ESPECIALLY SINCE MY FRIDGE BROKE DOWN and there was SSM THE NEXT DAY. but liujun saved me! i left the cake at her house after i bought it and collected it from her in the early morn. then there was the problem of where to put it. luckily the woman from the muslim stall in the engineering canteen near TCA was nice enough to keep the cake in her fridge. you cannot imagine how relieved i was, the whole night i was worrying whether the canteen would be open, where would i put the cake if it was not, will i have to ask mr goh whether i can use the fridge in the TCA, that'll be really worse case scenario............ hahahaha! finally after SSM, purdee went to the swimming complex to bathe, we lighted the candles on the cake and sang the birthday song. there we were, singing and eating our cake at the entrance of the swimming complex, there was even a dustbin there, eat already then straight away throw the rubbish away. we were 30 mins late for the 1 hr SSM lecture, hahaha!

anyway, did i say i met purdee on the bus with the birthday cake in my hands, i know i always meet her on the bus on the way to school but WHY TODAY?! but she abit pa jiao, she didn't notice the cake i was holding at all, hahaha! but the most coincidental thing is!! the same day, at night i went to VJC Chinese Orchestra Concert, after it ended i took 197 or 196 to bedok interchange. guess what?! I MET PURDEE ON THE BUS AGAIN!! this is very scary. hahaha, she happens to be in the Anglican High 'infested' Cornerstone Church. hahaha!

ok, this turned out to be kinda long, hahhaha! alrighty, i'll end here, i won't be updating very often.

Good Day.

The new semester has begun

finally school has started once again. as usual, no tutorials for the first week. regretably, i was suppose to have basic of entrepreneurship on tuesday, their only tutorial class this week. but. it was cancelled due to whoever knows what reason it is. i only had lessons from 4 to 6 yesterday and today. i was suppose to go to school at 9am today for psychology lecture but i crashed the one yesterday. so i attended school till7pm yesterday then i went to buy jasper's present with liujun. we got him a shirt. since they're getting an adidas jacket for him, why am i buying another shirt? because it lacks sincerity. attend a birthday party empty handed but fork out money for a mass combined present, just seems screwed up to me. too many people are sharing the present already. my life's really dull and boring, nothing's happening which is interesting enough for me to talk about. ill post some random pictures.


monday, i attended zhengyi's choir concert, she was really impressive. i think she's really talented though i think she doesn't realise it. i'm very proud of her. here are some pictures


a picture of the stage



i told them i didn't know how to do it





a group picture, i don know the guys, hahaa!

joe walsh rocks

you wanna make a memory - bon jovi

working is boring

it's really screwed up, hope i never have to work. well i know it's never gonna happen. 5 day work week, full time job. i'm not looking forward to working tomorrow. it's gonna be another boring day with nothing much i CAN do. i went to meet zhengyi today to buy tickets for her choir concert. zhengyi met junie on the bus! what a coincidence! junie damn pro sia.. at raffles JC now. hahaha! but sorta predictable too. she's always had very good results in sec 1 and sec 2. all the pros man. then we met alicia awhile after we alighted from the bus! cool... hahaha! but by then junie was already gone. if not it would have been a mini 2b gathering.

i've been practising guitar for a whole good half day but i'm still stuck on a riff of classical gas. the combination of notes very difficult to get used to. i see the rest of the song i also sian. hahaha! but i am going to persevere and master the song!! my fingers are peeling, hahaha!

finish here, goodnight
good day

4th day of work!!

work is getting better and better every day! abit lazy to blog but i'll talk about what happened yesterday.

i saw someone wearing only his red underwear in the toilet today, somemore with the door ajar. i think he was bathing or something. what a stupid guy. i went to tell my colleagues. they went and investigate. that guy insisted he was just washing his leg. wow... wash leg with only his underwear off. nice one man. before i left the toilet i even saw his washing his face and seemed to have foam on it. lame shit. according to my colleague, he abused the toilet paper in the toilet and even left them lying around in the toilet. inconsiderate.... i'm working at 1pm again tomorrow!! and i'll be on duty this saturday at kallang waterfront! i'll be doing some lucky draw thing with my colleague. come and find me if you're free! hahaha! i'll be starting work from about 1pm.

alrighty, time to bathe. goodnight!
Good Day

alrighty, 2nd day of work already.

first day of job was..... totally boring. freakin' boring, seriously. all i can remember about it is that i sat there infront of the counter and kept transferring calls to my colleagues because i didn't know anything. i felt so helpless. i feel like i'm getting money for nothing. and i hate that. i helped with afew easy stuff. i worked from 1pm to 10pm.

yesterday was the 2nd day of work. (after 12am already) it was boring as well. alot of time was spent sitting infront of the counter petrified. but i did more stuff than the first day that's for sure. and i became a little more confident in answering calls. 'hi good evening! kolam ayer CC. dennis speaking. how can i help you?' i still hate answering calls. why the hell has it got to be so long?!! i think the good evening and kolam ayer CC enough already. i don't think the person wants to know who i am! anyway, still felt helpless today. couldn't do alot of stuff because i didn't know anything. and the worst is i won't learn, because i'm only a temporary staff. meanwhile i'll be doing the simple and miscellaneous stuff. and i realise, actually a CC can be quite 'active'. as in, i thought it was a very 'dead' place. it can quite happening too. but it seriously lacks of youths. all you find there are kids and adults and elderly people. youths. errr.. wrong place. but you do find them there when they need rooms or street soccer court or badminton court, but rarely. working is very no-life. i think i'd like studying when i start working in the future, hahaha! i think it'll be the same for everyone too. unless of course if you have a job which you love.

i'm learning classical gas by mason williams! it's an incredible song. seriously. listen to it.



ending here, it's late, goodnight!
Good Day.

GOT JOB

i didn't go for the interview today because i was lazy. not because toa payoh was far but because i was lazy to write a resume. so.... i flipped open the classifieds and started looking. then i read one. 'Customer service at CCs'. it seems easy, so i called. guess what. the lady over the phone asked me to send a resume over. damn!! why resume?!!! so ma fan sia.... but oh well.. in the end i did write a resume and sent it over. super fast sia, they called me about 5 mins after i submitted it. i think they were desperately looking for someone to fill the position, because the lady kept emphasising on attendance, tell me to finish the assignment don't halfway quit. i was assigned to some kolam ayer community centre. ulu ulu one, at geylang bahru. hope it'll be an easy job! i will start work tomorrow at 1pm.

i had another dream last night! weird dream. i dreamt i fell down and knocked my teeth against something, forgot what it was. my canines broke off and my mouth bleeding like crazy. for some reason, in my dream, i was able to look into my mouth without looking into a mirror. because it broke off i tried to pull out the rest of the tooth out of my mouth. oh ya, then there as no blood already for some reason. hahaha! weird stuff happen in dreams. hahaha!

wish me luck for work!
Good Day!

conclusion of damned job

alright, so i went for the damn door to door flyer distribution thing, i realise that for the work we have to do, it's a damn rip off, seriously. 5 blocks i do about 3-4 hours, i only suppose to get 10 dollars. wtf? trust me it's damn tiring. somemore it was at punggol, i take mrt there so expensive, count in the travel expenses i think i don work better. hahaha! but i made a new friend today! her name is kulali, from TP too, mechatronics. i guess its worth it to make a new friend.

last night i laid on my bed thinking her. it was mixed with what the job today would be like. u know like.. how i'm going to cheong the flyers. i couldn't sleep for a long awhile, when i finally fell asleep, i had a dream. i dreamt of her. in my dream, i couldn't see her face. all i saw was her back view.. again. i was in the mrt. i only saw her after i got off and turned back to look into the carriage. her friend turned and looked at me. just like yesterday night. but she was oblivious. i guess this must mean something right? it happened just like yesterday night at tampines, just that in my dream, the setting was a different place. not at the bus terminal but underground in a mrt station. hahaha! i must have an affinity with transport places.

i just booked a slot for my basic theory test, i hope i can pass in just one try. hate doing retests. damn.. i think i should book afew slots now then next time if cannot make nit then just cancel then at least i have another one to back me up, hahaha! playing safe! lazy to type more.

Good Day

what a walk at tampines.....

today was the usual, slacking day. except today i did try to find jobs! i sent an email to some homebased data entry shit, turned out to be a 'scam'. its something like network marketing, except there is no company BUT it does work, it does earn money for you at home. seriously, definitely. well..i paid 25 dollars through bank transfer thanks to it. i wonder if i should use this method to recoup my loss? someone please advise me!!! i don want to scam people!! hahaha! Supposedly this method is legal. but i'm not very sure about it. i wish someone would clarify this for me. email the police ask whether this is legal! hahaha! for more information about the 'scam', ASK ME. hahaha!

i also smsed this guy for some door to door flyer distributing, no choice lah, desperate for money already.... hahaha! i'm suppose to start tomorrow. they say go sembawang mrt station at 12pm. thats...... far. damn... the pay rate is 16-20 dollars per 10 blocks. damn low. but oh well................. at least got abit of money. tomorrow i will wear bermudas and sports shoes and cheong all the way!! it will last 4 h0urs he said. 4 hours=240 minutes. if i do ten blocks, i have to finish 1 block in... wtf?! 24 mins?! omg! i'll have to do for minimum 6 days too. nevermind lah, short term job, hope I can at least get a hundred and fifty outta this lame shit. after this shit then i think i'll find another short term job before school starts.

oh ya, about the title of this post, getting to the main point. i met many people at tampines today when i went for a walk alone. the first person i met... i dunno whether she saw me or not. oh well.. what matters is i saw her. what a coincidence.. i saw her after i got off the bus when i started making my way to TM. i only saw her back. but i knew it was her, definitely. i couldn't be mistaken. definitely not with her. she probably didn't see me. my mood dampened alittle after seeing her, it just happens, no idea, why it happens. the next person i met was sherlyn! seeing her cheered me up alittle. hahaha! i think it's because she's really nice. As usual, i suanned her. hahaha! she's damn funny. i can really understand why Don likes her. i walked around somemore. i met yunzhen and jiemin! those 2 people slacking at haagen daas! hahaha! wah kao. xiang shou sia. chatted awhile then i continued my walk. i then met tingting, juanjie they all. i think they should be having some group outing or something. besides those 2 i only recognised another girl from anglican high, the rest i didn't really take notice of them. hahaha! then i continued my walk for a while more. i was tempted to go BHG again, but.... i didn't of course.. didn't dare to. walk around the pasar malam and had my favourite cheese hotdog!! damn nice. hahaha! pasar malam confirm must eat. imba. alrighty no more! i went home after that!

think i better sleep soon and wake up early, i have no idea how long it's going to take from bedok to sembawang so better set out early. mustn't be late ya know! hahaha!

Good Day

yo i'm back! and still jobless............

i really want a job!!!! (half heartedly) he really wants to work! he NEEDS the money!!! he needs to pay for chalet! he needs to pay for driving!! my chalet application got approved already, my chalet will be from 16th to 19th of june, haven decided what to do with it yet. it's book first then decide what to do with it. at most if i can't think of anything to do i'll just 'sell' it someone else i guess, hahaha! maybe just a regular party? just invite friends over and hang out? hahaha! i'll think of that next time. and about driving, i went to the comfort delgro shit at ubi today.. or rather yesterday. oh wow. look at the time. hahaha! anyways, i registered for theory and practical. the registration fee is $166 dollars (wtf?). lucky i had NETS with me, if not would have been super malu cuz i didn't bring that much cash with me. nearly got hacked by my mother, she told me to register for theory only, but whats done is done, hahahaha! can't wait to drive!! first! i must pass the stupid basic theory test! sian... theory theory theory... can't escape studying. it should be quite easy i guesss.....? i'll go look at the handbook later today or somethin. maybe today the newspaper will have good jobs!!! maybe! maybe they would want to hire students who can only work for barely a month!! *self deception*


ahaha. better go sleep, my mother just came out to scold me.

Good Day!

you belong to me = jason wade from life house

this songs rocks... seriously

chalet ended!

today was the last day of chalet. i was really looking forward to it before the exams but somehow when it came, it didn't turn out to be very exciting. i think it's because i was kind of anti social, i didn't go with the rest to wild wild wet, i wasn't really very active during the BBQ, when they went to play i stayed in the chalet and touched my guitar. i was looking forward to the 'performance' andy and i had planned for the class. we planned to perform 2 songs. love will keep us alive by the Eagles and time of your life by green day. in the end we didn't get to and we, for a moment, got melissa lin angry at us. we were practising when mel lin came and asked us to join in the games but we refused because we were intending to do the songs after. she got angry and left. after practising, we realised that there weren't much people left at the chalet and everyone was busy. playing mahjong, watching mahjong. sleeping? it wasn't really a good time to play. but we still. just that nobody really paid much attention. because they were playing mahjong. it was a real disappointment.

when albert left for home, andy and i sent him out of the chalet grounds. we then slacked at the Sunset Bar. there was supposed to be live band performances so we sat and watched but of course, we felt bad about being free loaders so we got a mug of tiger beer as 'tickets' to the performance. they played 'leaving on jet plane' by john denver, 'to love somebody' by beegees and other songs. there weren't much people around at the sunset bar. welll. this was expected, after all it was a weekday night. it's fun listening to a band playing live. i hope one day i can be like them too. playing infront of a live audience. alright... that sounded a little stupid. hahaha! i don't mind going back just to watch performances again. i'll go back there again one day.

after getting back, i tried playing cabalsea, somehow it didn't felt to be that appealing anymore. i can't keep my mind set on something for too long. that includes games but it may be a good thing though. errr well except for when it involves school work.

I'll end here now. Good Day.

JOB JOB WHERE ARE YOU!

George got a call from Recruit Express the other day. we went there last week to find jobs. the company was at orchard takashimaya tower. we there to fill in our details so they could find a job for us. by the way, us refers to george, kayhowe and me. so far i think only george received a call from them. i'd go ask kayhowe next time.

the explorer kids at downtown east also called me down for an interview. i was kinda happy when they called me, i thought had i finally found a job. but then when i went down with lian mei and her friend, the interviewer told us that explorer kids would be closed from 14 or 15 march because they were going to transfer to the next entertainment hub. the new building at downtown east. they were looking for people who could commit after vacation which is what i cannot do. my results are already so damn lousy. having to work every week would surely bring it down another level, hahaha! and then i went cheers to apply for a job. well, the person said the manager might call me down for an interview the day after since he/ she was not around that day. oh well. he/ she didn't call me. another dashed hope. damn, NEED JOB! need lobangs!!! need MONEY! hahaha! RECRUIT EXPRESS PLEASE CALL ME!!!

i have no idea why i need money. maybe it's to give me the sense of security that if something happens, at least i'd have some money to back me up. or maybe i want to buy another guitar, i'm mad.

nowadays i really feel like doing anything. though i say i need a job, i don't really feel like working. everything feels so meaningless. i keep thinking of you and.. i wonder how you feel about me. and i get these random occasionally lapses of heartaches and i have no idea why. they just happen. why can't things be a little more simple.

confidence is a lie people blind themselves with to seem smarter, i just can't lie to myself

who's the REAL asshole now?

i read a blog just now. it was presenting characteristics which an asshole possessed. i'm just gonna roughly touch on afew stuff which i felt weren't really right, i'm not going back to read that blog, because seriously.. it's just another asshole trying to seek attention by presenting his unrefined, uncivilised views. whoops did i use the word 'asshole'? oh well. its a word befitting him. lets see what i can remember.... oh yeah, he's really against fat people. he said they were 'fat fucks'. anyway, he said who snore loudly are assholes and most of them are 'fat fucks'. i'm saying in a way which may not seem offensive, but seriously... you should have read the way he phrased his words. anyway, how do you control snoring? then he was saying those who do brush their teeth at night before they go to sleep, those who do not bathe before they go to sleep and dug their noses .. blablabla. and then... as he said, he pulled the 'fat fucks' in again. i understand why it displeased him but that is the way some people are. we have no right to judge them. i don't mean he should not express what he felt in his blog but generalising the characteristics of an asshole relating them constantly to fat people. it's just screwed up. i was kind of worked up after reading it, i feel like punching him in the face whoever he is. but i really think he REALLY is the REAL asshole. hahaha! and did i he say he was against people following the japanese culture too? he was saying, 'how could people choose japanese over french?' why not? you have your preferences so do other people, what right have you to judge japanese as inferior to french. again, he is judging. i hate think that such people exist in this world. trying to create discords out of nothing for his own selfish, attention-seeking pleasures. his low emotional intelligence will bring his downfall.

i need a job seriously!!

see.. i have nothing to do, therefore i come to blog again. today, i went with george and kayhowe to recruit express to look for jobs. it's a job agency by the way. we were told there were currently no job vacancies but we would be notified if there were openings. i guess all i can do is wait. or go find another job on my own. Cheers at downtown east has a notice looking for people. i feel going in to ask. i'm really desperate for job and money already. hai... and i realise i have been eating too much fast food and too much unhealthy stuff. my tummy is getting bigger. i can feel it already. i guess it REALLY is time to do something about it. hahaha! been really inactive since i entered poly. i think i will die of heart attack or get diabetes soon. i will definitely get diabetes due to heredity. it's only a matter of time. hahaha!  but heart attack... i will if i don't control my diet soon. hahaha! alright, i'm finished here, byebye!

Random

Home by Micheal Buble, beautiful song

Nothing to do.. blog..

i think i've been coming here more often nowadays.. i think it's because i really have nothing to do. i'm using windows live writer to blog right now. it's quite cool. it actually comes with the installation of windows live messenger, well, you'll have to indicated that you want to install windows live writer before the installation if not it doesn't include it. it actually works just like the posting thing on blogger.com but it's kinda cool to have it in your computer. i think it saves a copy of the post on your computer too. then there's the usual 'insert picture' all those stuff. i'm still exploring the features, hahaha!

 

i've been attempting to write songs recently, but haven't been successful just yet. i guess i'll just have to keep trying! maybe i have no talent...? but i'm still going to try!! if i do manage to force something out of my brain i'll post it up here! hahaha! but i doubt it'll be anything good anyway. hahaha!

 

today i slacked the whole day at home until in the afternoon, alan asked me to go Tampines Mall with him to buy shoes and bottom. Going shopping with him is quite a torture from past experiences. i shan't elaborate. hahaa! long story. LONG. but surprisingly the 'story' today was quite short, hahaha! I saw 2 good friends of Hers' at Tampines Mall. i saw one of them at the Mac opposite KFC. and another one while i was walking to MRT station. i was hoping to see her too... but i guess it was just a coincidence that i saw 2 of her friends. i believe they probably didn't even know the other was at Tampines.

It's time to get a job again. i'm already starting to get bored and beginning to start sleeping half-days away. i should find something constructive to do. i should go running or swimming today. anyway, it reminds  me, my mother asked me this morning, 'did anyone ask you to act as the role of zhubajie?' ...... wtf? hahaha! of course, it was jokingly of course, but i know i am fat. SELF AWARENESS....

 

good day! to everyone having holidays! enjoy!

Finally, the holidays are here!

i screwed up marketing today, but its ok. because it's holidays now. i shan't think about it anymore! anyway, if anybody wanted to know, i went to sleep after posting last night. went for measuring for the service uniform which i will have to wear every week next semester after exam. it took a really long time. according to the document we were given, it said 12pm - 1pm.but it definitely took much longer than that. there were only 2 tailors working, they took on the average 1min 30seconds on each person. there were hundreds of student, imagine how long they took and how long we had to wait standing up.

after measuring, a group of us went TM. my purpose was to buy strings. i wasn't intending on eating, but ended up eating at fish n co. everyone was indecisive only after they walked into the restaurant did they decide that they really didn't want to eat at fish n co. i admit i was kinda bushuang at that time. i hate leaving the restaurant only after the waitress had led us into the restaurant. i think the thinking part should have been done before we even stepped into the restaurant. well.. so the half of them disappeared and supposedly went to ajisen. i wasn't really hungry but i ate anyways, i had some ginza salmon or something. not bad, it was quite nice. i left soon after we finished eating, i didn't go andjoin the rest because i was really tired. so.... i go went home to sleep. hahahaha! there's really nothing interesting about today. except of course i saw her during the measuring thing. well.. actually i always see her. hahaha! but it's nice to see her for the last time before next semester. who knows! maybe i'll get into the same class as her! maybe... hahahaa! not very possible.

can't wait! holidays!!

i'm cheong marketing now! but in afew hours time i'll finally be free!! but still have to go for measurements for the service uniform, next semester i'll be taking service skill methodology aka SSM. it seems rather intimidating to me right now, and i'm not in the least excited about it. though it's really more hands on than theory. i'll be 'working' at Sugarloaf and Table Top... or Top Table.ahh.. shit, hahaha! i forgot. well.. they sound good either ways. hahaha! it's intimidating because of the tutors, especially the rather big sized guy. he seems like a 'no-nonsense' guy when he introduced the subject to the lecture group during marketing lecture.

i can't wait for chalet! i can't wait to make money! i feel like buying a new guitar. probably for my sister, who supposedly wants to learn how to play and i'm going to teach her.. i think. hahaha! i love spreading the LOVE of guitar! i wanna buy the ZEN ovation style guitar. it's priced rather low at 88 dollars, it looks really nice, but i'm rather worried about the quality because i haven really tried it before. i mean i did but it was only for awhile and i can't really remember. the guitar was wenyong's. i guess the only way to go down to peninsular and try! oh yeah, and my SD-3's 'A' string broke today. i had no idea why it broke. probably because i adjusted the truss rod quite a fair bit. the truss rod is actually a mechanism which counteracts the tension of the strings on the neck. i'm going with andy to buy strings after the measurement session at TCA. oh yeah, and the uniform costs 65 dollars including a wine opener and name tag. so ex.... add 23 dollars can buy my ZEN ovation style guitar. hahaha! alright i should stop now, i'm going to study... or sleep...? i'll decide after i publish this post.

i'm a noob

a passerby told me to use imeem to get songs on my blog, i tried, i thought it worked. i realised it only played for 30 seconds. it doesn't seem to work for me or maybe i did it the wrong way or somethin'. either ways, no point putting it on if it only plays for 30 seconds, hahaha! so i'm removing it. u want songs?! get from me! hahaha!

wonder how many people actually come here other than me. hmmm..................


It's your love by tim mcgraw and faith hill.... nice song, listen to it

screwed up OB paper

i was particularly nervous today. and really tired. i thought i wouldn't be so i woke up at 5am to study, but i realised i couldn't concentrate. not when i was studying, not when i was in the examination hall. i think i need to refresh my memory but looking at everything before i step into the examination hall if not my mind go blank like it did today during OB paper. i'll try that next time. i hope i don't fail the paper and qualify for Supplementary paper, because i would hate that.

i seriously don't know how to study for marketing. there's just too much to study. a look at the book gives me the chills. hahaha! alright, time to get back to work! good day! or maybe bad day, damned OB paper, i screwed it up....

yo. i'm screwed up

i realised i'm not as passive as i think i am, like deleted a few of my previous posts. but i don really regret it though, just thinking why i did that, hahahha! i really wish i had much more self confidence, i really admire people with it. when i look at them, it just seems so scary to be in the same situation as them, putting myself in their shoes, i would have given up hope. hai.... its morning 7.04am, i woke up for awhile, it's time to go back to sleep, goodnight

happy chinese new year everyone!

today is the first day of chinese new year!

on the eve of chinese new year eve, which was 2 days before today, which was yesterday yesterday, which was 5th of February. alright, i think you know when it is, hahaha! it was a tuesday. the regular Tuesdays usually permit me to go home at 11am but because there was BCS test at 6.30pm that day i had to stay in school. lame shit, somemore that day the marketing lecture ended after 1 hour, which means dismissed at 10am!!! why the hell did they set the test at such a time sia. but well... there're some things worth waiting for. hahaha! nevermind. anyway, the test sucked, i think i screwed it up. i went han river at east point to reunion dinner with my NCC people! its table bbq, as expected, we played with the food. one of the soup become herbal soup. i don't mean it tastes like herbal soup. it looks like herbal soup. u know... black? hahaha! though only 10 people showed up, gathering with them again is fun. not that much a reunion dinner. we took some group pictures after the dinner. i'll post them up here if i remember to get them from wenyong.

alright, on the eve of chinese new year which was yesterday, i went to my aunt's house in the evening. as always every year for steamboat. ain't really close to my cousins, so it's kinda boring, i don't talk to my brother too. so most of the time i'm just sitting somewhere. hahaha! i think i'm screwed up and anti social. i find it really hard to talk freely to people whom i'm not really close to. i wished i could though. i was born like that i guess.

ahh... finally. today! i went only one place, which is my aunt's house again! it's like a tradition, every year, all my relatives on my father's side would gather at my aunt's house for reunion dinner and in the morning of the first day of chinese new year. as long as i can remember, it has never changed. hahaha! i stayed there the whole day from morning. seriously. hahaha! normally we would go afew more houses then go home sleep then go back my aunt's house eat dinner again. yup, really, is sleep. whole family go home shui jiao, hahaha! we're like that, halfway will tired one then someone would make a suggestion to go home sleep. then we all agree, then go home sleep! i stayed there till dinner, then went home after eating.

i serious hate typing long posts, i know this ain't long compared to others i've read but at least, to me this is long... and tedious, hahaha!

she's somewhere across the causeway, and i think i miss her. i think...